11 Comments

This article resonated with me as well. I am fortunate that I really have never been harassed on social media. But I rarely post to social media because I found it unhealthy for me in other ways. I confess I didn’t always share links to my blog posts on social media because I didn’t have the courage to risk people ridiculing my views which are at times religious and radical. But even when I shared light, non-controversial posts, I would find that I checked social media obsessively, eager for likes and comments, which sometimes didn’t come. I would take this lack of interest personally, but then later became aware that social media manipulated what people see in their news feeds. My posts were not sensational, violent, divisive, so my friends most likely would not have seen them unless they intentionally clicked on my page. I have found I write better, and feel healthier mentally when I write just for me and let readers discover me on their own. If there is a particular post I feel would resonate with a friend, I tell them about it in-person. But I recognize that although I am disadvantaged in a way since I am blind, I am privileged in that I am a white suburban woman who does not have to depend on writing for my livelihood.

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Thank you so much for sharing, Allison. It is true-- there's a difference between writing and being prepared for reactive responses and writing because we know for ourselves what we need to write. I feel this too.

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Thank you for writing this. As I've been working on my first book manuscript (and working full-time, and recovering from surgery, and, and...) I've stopped posting as much online - and I've had that nagging doubt in the back of my mind the whole time - while still trying to maintain a cadence here on Substack. Do you know the work of danah boyd (they lowercase their name)? They (along with some other internet researchers) use the term "networked publics" to describe social media - and that framework has been such a help to me.

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It breaks my heart that people find it necessary to leave because of harassment and the crappiness of others. Sometimes I do follow those I learn from to patreon, substack or discord. It really depends on who it is. I have the luxury/privilege of being a white middle class woman who doesn't depend on social media for a living so I realize it is a privilege to block people, hide people, and have little to no consequence in my life for doing so.

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This is so resonant - I don’t plan on staying on social media much longer because of the buzzing it creates in my body that I carry with me every day I use it. This is practical and validating. Thank you!

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Yes! For the already sensitive among us, it is so necessary to set boundaries. But how long do we keep setting them? How do we keep going in these toxic cycles?

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Right? It feels like a daily cost-benefits analysis, which itself it tiresome… how much meaningful connection is happening in this space, and is it worth the noise and disruptiveness that also comes with it to stay?

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Wow, it was a delight to see your email in my inbox today!!!! I have lowered my intake of social media also. I came off twitter, Facebook is only for getting Steven Charleston in the morning and IG. With all the deconstruction in my life and belief systems I'm very careful of what I put out there in the world.

On a sidenote, I'm feeling today to write a poem! Thank you for opening that in me!!

Love you,

Gloria

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Oh, keep writing Gloria! Keep writing!

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Thoughtful piece. My experience may be different than yours but I can appreciate what you are saying. For my part I try to make social media thoughtful and positive, with the occasional dose of criticism when I see a problem, but I try to avoid personal attacks. I am also trying to make a point of amplifying the voices from different walks of life but I can do more. Thank you.

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This arfticle and question really connected with me today. I significantly decreased my social media use in September of 2021, and have not really gone back to my previous levels. I left Twitter in 2017 after the former president was elected. I decreased instagram use last summer after some challenging interactions and what struck ne as a high amouyt of arfticiality and deception on that platform, and my oiwn tendency to get sucked into long stretches of use or impulsive dopamine rushes. I decreased facebook in September for similar reasons, and my distaste for the leaders of these social media platforms. I use it mostly now for work, to be connected to folks whom I have no other way to be in touch, and to share positive and affirming words from time to time. I am more conscious to not add to the toxicity that I see on so much social media, and to hold myself accountable for what I post and proclaim and the mistakes I make, rather than blame the platform. I will say I do not miss the usage, and my life is greater, not less, because of the time and affirming energy flowing into my life from sources other than social media.

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