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Margaret Somerville's avatar

There used to be a lever that I would whack

with hurried abandon

when I reached the end of the line

eager for my thoughts not to be interrupted

by the mechanics.

What luxury to find the key

to smoother composition

and a pinkie that could find

Return.

But oh, the joy, when words came in uninterrupted freedom across the page and far beyond in streams of unhinged wanderings.

Then one day the confines of grammar loosed themselves as well

and prose turned into verse.

Return became a way to enter

the deeper mysteries of the source.

ElaineE's avatar

I can hear your joy in this clever poem. What a delight to read it!

Jeanette Mayo's avatar

Love this!!! The pinkie ease. Oh yes!

Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Return, I whisper…

please return.

But you are gone.

And yet I still find you,

in the whisper of the wind,

in the dancing rainbows in our kitchen.

I find you in the early dawn hours

in my dreams.

You are still there

hovering around me

at all times of the day.

You were never really gone…

You keep returning every day.

Fauna Lang's avatar

Dear Kaitlin,

This community has meant so much to me this month of May, a Word a Day. I don’t know how I’ll replace the routine part of my life that it has become.

It’s increased my desire to learn more about Substack, that’s for sure.

I’m also grateful for the many new friendships that I see forming. What a welcoming group of poets! I’d love to create a space to continue our friendships!

With love and heartfelt gratitude,

Fauna 🌹🥹🥰

Fauna Lang's avatar

Beautiful Nancy. I love this so much. Yes. We are in this long season of watching children and grandchildren growing and moving into their bigger lives and out of the care that has been our place in their lives. It’s not quite the same and yet your poem touches my heart, a reminder that they are always with us and always will be. I’m so grateful. How precious and sacred and real. Thank you. ♥️🙂

Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Fauna, thank for letting me know that this poem spoke to you.

Fauna Lang's avatar

I didn’t see your note about your daughter, Nancy, until after I shared. I am so very sorry. Not the same at all!!

Your poem is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your heart.

Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

There are similarities, the “gone” differs. But there is still a longing I feel for my living daughter that we only get to see in person a few times of the year.

Margaret Somerville's avatar

Loss carries so many layers, doesn’t it? Thank you for sharing yours with us so we can hold this space with you

Margaret Somerville's avatar

Thank you for the picture of loss found.

Nancy E. Holroyd, RN's avatar

Its been 2+ years since my middle daughter's death and yet she continues to return in countless ways.

Korie's avatar

I am so sorry for your loss, Nancy. As a mother myself, it is hard to imagine that kind of heartbreak. Blessings to you.

ElaineE's avatar

I'm so sorry for your deep loss, Nancy. How wonderful that she returns to you in countless ways, and thank you for sharing this blessing in your beautiful poem.

ElaineE's avatar

Beautiful, Nancy. Thank you for evoking memories of loved ones we've lost but who return with signs of their enduring presence.

Jeanette Mayo's avatar

Return to sacred sender; this letter keeps ending up at the wrong address.

Return overdue; this book has run out of pages and longs for a new ending.

Returns accepted; this item has been made to believe it’s defective, the flare ups and trauma returning like bitter boomerangs.

Return to eternal source; this “old soul” has been a square human in a round world and is weary. And yet . . .

this luscious life returns a profit of plentiful wonder, high yields of glorious YES, an abandon of abundance—so cancel my return trip, why would I want to miss this?

Margaret Somerville's avatar

oh to live with plentiful wonder in the abandon of abundance - YES!

Sarita Robb-Scott's avatar

"high yields of glorious YES" - YES!

A. Wilder Westgate (she/they)'s avatar

I return to the same lessons

again and again, hoping

one of these days they might sink in

far enough that I can give it a rest,

like life is a test and I'm so afraid of failing

I stay up cramming instead of stopping

to take a breath, and I think we all know

how that trope usually ends.

Korie's avatar

I return again

to the chair

on the porch

with a view

of the water,

seeking nothing

but time out of time,

freedom from striving,

the peaceful calm

that stays with me

at heart until

I return here again.

Fauna Lang's avatar

Ahhhhh… yes…. 💛

Phoebe Noetzel's avatar

unfurled from the

Holy Spiral that

created you

- a goosebump moment for me as I'm mid writing a post about ferns and the same sentiment!! (And also getting ready for a pentecost creative workshop one "fire" this evening, so your "flame" resonated too. Thank you Kaitlyn for the encouragement to keep going with my other creative projects!

Caitlin H. Mallery's avatar

Salmon swim out to sea and back up rivers

Geese traverse the longitudinal seasons

And I return to the familiar rhythms

Of ordinary time each summer.

Margaret Somerville's avatar

Kaitlin, this is so tender, flourishing in the soil that made you. Thank you for this beauty.

Phoebe Noetzel's avatar

Returning

like something that has been lost

a coin

a sheep

a child.

Wherever I am

may I remember

there is Someone

searching for

me

and ready to throw a party

when I'm

found.

Jeanette Mayo's avatar

Oh the sweet surrender to being searched for! Beautiful.

Phoebe Noetzel's avatar

Thank you Jeanette.

Sarita Robb-Scott's avatar

Return

Sometimes I wish I could return to the good old days. We used to say that sometimes around the dinner table, "remember that time...? Those were the good old days." And my dad would clear his throat, exaggeratedly, comedically and say " THESE are the good old days!"

And he was right, the memories we made and the resilience we built through leaning in to both scarcity and abundance, finding joy amidst pockets of pain became the good old days we would inevitably one day with to return to.

And each time, in keeping with the rhythms of life, we would wish for a return and be reminded that we were here, now, making our own good old days together.

Sometimes I wish I could return to the good old days. Then, with a smile, I remember my dad's advice to be more present in the current moment than in past remembrance. "Ahem, THESE are the good old days."

ElaineE's avatar

Kaitlin, thank you for today's evocative word, and your tender, beautiful poem. I'm very grateful for all the gifts you've given us during month of poetry as medicine.

RETURN

/

Return to the ferns, the mosses, and the trees.

Take no devices or distractions.

Bring only perception and intuition.

/

Follow your heart to its cabin,

The hidden place at the base

of the elder Western Red Cedar.

/

Sink deep and stay long.

/

Look

Listen

Smell

Taste

Touch

/

Return to yourself.

/

Be in no hurry to leave this sacred space.

/

But when your heart knows

It’s time to return

To the daily path that you walk —

/

Gently press your hand to the ground,

Kiss the Earth with a prayer,

Then rise up, whole and renewed.

Fauna Lang's avatar

I was doing so well with Surrender.

I was trusting and believing because Someone I know loves me told me I could.

That Someone told me that there was more for me to discover about myself and God and that the way there was through a door of “not knowing”.

Something like this whole weird idea of believing without seeing.

It held my attention for about 2 weeks.

Then the struggle. The seeing of so many things; injustices, heartfelt pain and as you can imagine, “I can fix this” came back to life within me.

No. Worse.

“I MUST FIX THIS because no one else is and no one else cares,” returned with a vengeance, robbing me of the peace I had finally given myself over to through the door of my “Surrender”.

Yet Grace does Live Within Me. I woke to whispers this morning. Each step of my morning routine found the words, “Surrender.” “Let Go” “Return.”

The whispers got a little louder, not to be ignored, so I reached back into my journal wondering how I had come to believe that “Surrender” was the only door open to me a couple weeks ago.

Don’t give me too much credit though. I could push any other door open. The choice will always be mine but the Open Door, the one that said, clearly, “Surrender”, was still open, waiting for me.

Now I when I look at that door, I notice the words, “The Way to Return” written on that Doorpost. Was it there the first time I entered?

At first I had only seen the colors and heard the music when I peeked inside.

Now I could see the challenges lying a little bit further out. (I may never have entered in the first place had I realized!)

“Return. Return. Return.”

I hear the words like a bird’s song repeating, sweetly in my ears, moving into my heart as I take notice.

The Garden in my heart. Life unfolding around me; not good or bad, all of it Life.

What seemed Cruel in the asking is awakened once again as I simply decide to Return to that place of unknowing, that place of trust.

Challenges daring me to see things differently.

I think.

No. I believe.

And as I believe, I see.

I Return.

Fauna Lang's avatar

Oh! Lesson for today!

Remember less can be more. Write for me first then what and if I want to share.

RETURN to what I wrote.

Next time! ♥️

Steven Barbery's avatar

return

remember you are dust

and to dust you will return

that will occur soon enough

what do we return before then

return thanks for all our blessings

even the smallest ones

return forgiveness to those who have wrong us

even those we don't like

return love into the dialogue filled with hate

even if we want to respond nastily

return blessings to a world in need

even if it is "may God bless you and keep you"

(and don't forget to return your library books)

Kristen Masterson's avatar

Kaitlin, so beautiful and grounding

Karen Sue Hybertsen's avatar

Return

to what

what

is it even possible

what

do we leave behind

get back

are we stepping foot

into

a labyrinth

or

a maze

As I thought of return I found myself thinking of the familiar saying that you can't step into the same river twice and perhaps, wandered off the beaten path

Francesca Tolond's avatar

Travelling the long journey to the place that my heart calls home

The wild place full of heather and grasses

Surrounded by the sea

The smell the salt water with the seaweed

The colour of the sand against the russet rocks

The corncrake in the long grass singing its rasping song

The short nights and ruby red sunrises

The rain that comes in stair rods and soaks the clothes

The wind that howls is mournful song across the island

The place my heart calls home is in ruins now

It once was beautiful, full of kindness

The place that your soul can reside

With wild flowers growing in its grounds.

People walk through it not aware of the power

The healing that is in this ground

BUT

If you stop and still your mind

Sit awhile in the space

Let time stand still

Be touched by the spirits

It will become home

And you will always return

Margaret Somerville's avatar

Ahhh, sounds like the nunnery on Iona to me!

Carolyn Brannon's avatar

A thin place indeed💜